In our house

This weekend at a birthday party I was surrounded by moms from my daughters class.  The conversation turned to Valentines Day and I was asked outright what I was doing for treat bags for the kids.  I bluntly replied "nothing."  to which, and I kid you not, there were audible gasps.  I informed the slack jawed, wide eyed group that I bought a $2 box of those paper valentines (the paw patrol ones E requested) and she will painstakingly write her name on 14 of them to hand out to her class....Done.

In return I found out each of them will be providing the class with loot bags and homemade snacks.  Jell-o squares, play-doh, more dollar store notepads, pencils, bubbles, and lollipops then we ever need, and all wrapped in decorative bags or fashioned into butterflies (thank you Pinterest).

I repeated thanks, E will love them, you guys won't receive anything like that from us.

For Christmas E received all sorts of "gifts" from her class.  Books, pencils, large chocolates, crayons and coloring books, and the kicker....a junior mani/pedi gift certificate at a spa in town (RIGHT!!)

I am totally grateful, I will adore bringing her to the spa but OMG!  I was 30 before I got my first pedicure and I'm still waiting to grow out of nail biting so I can get a manicure.

But I stand firmly in the camp that I'm not doing it.  I'm not stretching my already thin self even more so that my kid brings in some art deco items to hand to her friends made solely to impress the parents.  Because the kids truly care less about packaging and shabby chic hand stamped brown paper bags with the lace imprinted heart and chalkboard style tag that burst a mountain of glitter into the air and plays a maroon 5 tune as you open it to reveal your play-doh pot and heart pencil next to a gluten free, dairy free, nut free, organic cupcake with avacado chocolate icing sweetened with brown rice syrup that the guy at the health food store says you must buy because if you do the company will send a family a goat for every bottle you buy (and you know it's true because with the cupcake is a picture of Miguel the goat being sent right now to the family.)

So parents, when your kids come home from school, daycare, camp, wherever, and they have a bundle of gifts and treats all so beautifully done that you start to judge that one kid who only gave everyone a paper valentine with her name printed all squiggly and cute on it...because she did it....all 14 of them...herself...even though it was painstakingly boring for her mother to sit there and watch...don't judge.  Assume mom had other things to do, assume mom spent her free time sliding with her kids, or she really didn't have $50 to throw at disposable junk for a bunch of school kids, assume that she set the bar so low that next time you can join her and thank her for that.

I've listened to my body the last few weeks.  I've been slow, a homebody, reluctant to push myself mentally or physically beyond limits.  But I also noticed that while I needed this time, it had a negative affect on my kids.  They were short tempered, more prone to fighting with each other, their tones were harsh and yelling, and there were moments of pure defiance which is very new to me.

This weekend I knew we had to make a change for the better.  I planned activities that got us out and active and some new things to shake up the familiar routine.

We went sliding and had a blast using the jumps made by others, I couldn't resist a run down the hill too.
Ice Skating




 chocolate fondue



200 hundred glow sticks with connectors that left me with literally an hour of contented play while I danced around the kitchen listening to one hit wonders of the 90's and the kids built so many things out of them.
Combined with my friend taking J to the movie because he knew Star Wars was not my thing but J loved it, a fun day at church, a birthday party at an indoor playground, and two meals with friends, we had a busy active weekend that gave us a great combination of relaxation and activity.  It also reminded me that I am going to have hard times, I am going to have to push through days that are rough and where I am exhausted, and while I deserve days where I let chores go to the wayside and indulge in a little too much screen time...the benefits outweigh the negatives when we get outside and stay active.

With the changes in my life I felt it time to start fresh, find a new space to continue my journey in and tell my story.